Monday, 5 September 2016

Passing through the Twaklinishi Memorial Gates into the Garden of Enlightenment

When you no longer exist physically in the world of ordinary mortals, you may have the opportunity to pass through the Twaklinishi memorial gates into the garden of enlightenment.

Ordinary mortals do not have the qualifications through which to enter the garden of enlightenment though they may catch glimpses of it through the railings of reality on either side of the Twaklinishi memorial gates.

The garden of enlightenment is a perfect circle.  The inner railings of reality extend right around the circumference in an equilateral dodecagon, except for the side to the north, which is where the Twaklinishi memorial gates are located.

As well as the inner railings of reality, there are the outer railings of reality.  These surround the inner railings, approximately 1.618 metres away.  The garden of enlightenment itself has a diameter of 1.618 kilometres.

The space between the inner and outer railings of reality is a perfectly paved circle.  There is gravel around the base of both sets of railings but no weeds ever grow there.

The outer railings form a perfect dodecagon, too, except for the three most northerly sections.  In their place are railings of reality going in a northerly direction for 16.18 metres.  Those railings then join the railings surrounding the grounds for gracious causes.

The path of enlightenment extends southwards from the ordinary back garden of the ordinary house behind which Villa Twaklinilkawt sits.  It then forms a circle within the courtyard of compasssion before extending through the gateway of gratitude under the gatehouse.  

The path of enlightenment then continues for 16.18 metres into the heart of the gardens of welcome at the front of the main house .  It then extends for 161.8 metres to both the east and west, into the grounds for gracious causes.

Then the path to the east and west of Villa Twaklinilkawt meanders for 1.618 kilometres until it joins as one again, 16.18 metres from the south side of the observation tower.

The path of enlightenment then goes directly southwards for 1.618 kilometres, to the Twaklinishi memorial gates.  Throughout its length, the path of enlightenment is 1.618 metres wide.

At 16.18 metres high, the railings of philosophy surrounding the grounds for gracious causes are the same height as the railings of reality.  Yet there is no gateway in the railings from the grounds for gracious causes under which the path of enlightenment passes.

Nor are there any gateways within the railings of philosophy through which to reach the railings of reality.   The Twaklinishi memorial gates can only be reached by mysterious means.

There has often been speculation, amongst relatively unenlightened visitors, that the stream of consciousness leads to another opening into the garden of enlightenment.  The stream flows from the eternal spring of creativity under the bridge of wisdom, 161.8 metres along the path of enlightenment directly to the south of the observation tower.

Yet the stream of consciousness dries up about 161.8 metres to the east and west.  It then sinks into the subsoil of the subconscious swamps, into which the unwary sometimes find themselves submerged.

The garden of enlightenment is directly to the south of the observation tower yet it is never in the shadow of the tower.  Nor is it ever in darkness.  It flourishes beautifully though there is never any rain there.  There are no plant diseases or ugly insects to worry anyone.

The temperature is a constant 23C.  There is never more than a gentle breeze wafting.  The humidity is neither too high nor too low.  There are no carnivorous beasts in the garden, nor stampeding herbivores.

Delicious fruits of a lifetime grow in the garden of enlightenment all year round.  They are always fully ripe.  The fruit never rots or falls.  All the nutrients and energy requirements for eternity are supplied in one bite.  The fruit never needs washing.

To find out how to pass through the Twaklinishi memorial gates and into the garden of enlightenment, please register for the necessarily esoteric training course.  The course is conducted by a member of the Twaklinishi and several semi-qualified, fully supervised underlings.

Now, do make your way back towards the gardens of welcome for the next part of the public tour.